Wednesday, February 20, 2019

For some reason

I can not bring myself to pack up Wade's clothes. Several times now I've thought I should pack them up but I can't do it. Just yesterday I was going through all my clothes in the closet. I was able to pull several things out and pack them up for donation. I looked at Wade's things hanging there and again, couldn't do it.

I keep telling myself if I do this I'll have the whole closet to spread my stuff out in. Plus if I do the dresser too I'll have so much more room. But no. I don't get it. I don't understand what is keeping me from doing this.

22 comments:

Ginny Hartzler said...

I do understand. It is so hard. Beyond hard. You need to take your time with this, just leave it if you need to. Enough pain for now.

MadSnapper said...

we are all different, some do it right away and some wait like you are. there is no right or wrong way. i believe when you are ready, they you will do it... do what you want/need to do, it is your decision... love you, hugs and love coming your way

Kate said...

You'll be able to do it when you're ready - not to worry. (())

FlowerLady Lorraine said...

You are NOT ready yet. I did it rather quickly I have to say as it was just too painful seeing his shirts hanging in the closet. I do have maybe 4 of his shirts that had been in the laundry, and that he wore a lot, they are folded and in a drawer. I wear his jean jacket. I cried a lot while packing things up to give away. Tears are healing, and the clothes went to others who could wear and appreciate them.

Don't stress dear Ann, you will do it when the time is right for you.

Love, hugs & prayers for you ~ FlowerLady

Donna said...

I’m with Lorraine...when the time is right, you’ll simply, do it. I hung onto my mom and dad’s things for five years or so after they passed. One day, I felt this overwhelming urge to just Do It. The words popped into my mind...”It’s just stuff...We’re not there”...
I packed up everything except the closest things to my heart then donated. I didn’t have enough clothing to create a quilt with or I’d have done that as well. Can’t tell you how much better I felt. I also realized, I’ll not leave tons of “stuff” for our Crystal to have to deal with. I’ve been cleaning out “stuff” for about a year and a half now.

You’ll know...
♥️ Hug

Grace said...

Sure you do - You're not ready yet. You have issues to resolve, maybe more than you are consciously aware of. What ever happened with the 'grief' group you were attending?

Sandee said...

When you're ready you'll pack it up and put it somewhere in your home. Then it will stay there for however long it needs to be there and then you may or may not give it away. It's all good, Ann.

Have a fabulous day, my friend. Big hug to you and lots of scritches to Gibbs. ♥♥♥

Pam said...

With me, I find it easier to pack the clothes but not the personal stuff. However I am keeping a lot of clothes to make things with for the other family members. Check out PINTEREST for memory items from clothes. Wades shirts would make great pillows.

Out on the prairie said...

keep a favorite to wrap up in and stay warm.

NanaDiana said...

You're still processing everything, Ann. It takes time and for some people it is months, for some it is years. You will KNOW when the time is right and, although you may do it with a lump in your throat, it will be doable. I hope you have a good night.

Ann said...

Yes, this is one that will just have to wait for the right time.

Ann said...

That I will

Ann said...

Yes, you're right, I do know and I'm not ready.
The grief group that I was going to go to I skipped because of weather and then I've never looked to see when the next one started up. I should do that but then maybe I"m not ready for that yet either.

Ann said...

OMG, I think you know me too well. Yes, I probably will pack it up and let it sit somewhere for a while before it moves on

Ann said...

Yep, I've already thought of making pillows with a few of his shirts. His daughters took some and had memory bears made with them

Ann said...

I've already claimed a buffalo plaid flannel :)

Ann said...

Thanks. Yes, I've come to find out that that's how things work

CheerfulMonk said...

I'm with everyone -- when the time is right you will do it. Bless you.

Catherine - Mixed Media Artist said...

I'm also with everyone - but if you do decide to gift away anything, don't do it in your own home town...because you may see "whatever" on someone else, take it to another town/city, where it will be just anonymous...

Lin said...

You will know what to do when it is time. That is called healing. Everyone has already said all of that, so I won't repeat. I would think it would be comforting to stick you face in those clothes...smell his smell again...have a good cry. Maybe wrap yourself in one of those flannels in a quiet moment or just wear it when you are thinking of him or just need a little support. Be kind to yourself, Annie! All of this takes time.

Annsterw said...

When you are ready you will know it...don;t push yourself. There is no reason. When a beloved friend of mine passed; his mother made me a pillow out of his shirt and I cherish it to this day. A few of the shirts in the photo would make awesome, cute pillows and then you keep the shirts and still have more room in the closet! WIN WIN! Hugs to you...no hurry to make any decisions.

Debby@Just Breathe said...

It's okay, there is no rush. Everyone has their own time frame when it comes to this. ((Hugs))

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